"NO!"

thats all my mom ever says to me. I help around the house all the time, and I always have to reject all the fun events that come up. Prior to that, I think that if I keep taking in all these "no's" I will definitly have a boring and unmemorable senior year. I know.. I promised to help my mom whenever I can but its to the point where I feel so isolated from anybody else that I can't even form a nice conversation between any of my bestfriends. In fact, I dont know whats going on between my friends, I'm always the last to know things, and i'm physically so drained from trying to keep up with my grades while cooking a decent dinner for my family. It just feels as though i'm trapped inside this box and i can't ever seem to break it open. I know I sometimes say that i'm going to set things straight to my mom but.. whenever I do try to approach this issue to them, I always feel like i'm disrespecting my parents. I know they try to protect me from outer things and horriable events but COME ON, i'm 17! ( by the way, I consider this age a pre-adult stage)

AND on top of that, I probably wont do anything for my official birthday get together with my friends! WHAT IS THIS FUUUREAKING MADNESS?! ugh ):

well, I just wanted to vent over what i'm currently feeling so forgive me for being such a pessimistic..

gosh I just want to go 1 DAY
JUST 1 DAY
to relax and take a breather
from parental control (and I dont mean the mtv show)

well I just hope.
and swallow everythang in.

thats all I'll be willing to do now..
until I find a day to really stand up
to them..

*sigh, I sure hope that moment comes soon